The crazy world of new words | Editorial

The Oxford English Dictionary announced in June that approximately 500 words have been added to its dictionary.

The article about the added words made me all warm and fuzzy inside, as if I had just opened a gift of eight-track cassettes of C-Span’s Book TV – the greatest hits.

I suspect 500 words is larger than my entire working vocabulary, unless growls, gasps and weird sounds count. (I think they do.)

Here are a few of Oxford’s additions that caught my wandering attention.

• Carnap – stealing a car, (not what I do while driving). It was first used as a verb in 1937 in the Helena Independent Record in Montana.

• Gointer – It is a verb, and one of my new favorites. Oxford said it is a colloquial expression for “going to.” Example: I am gointer regurgitate your so-called food. Is this a great word or what? You say going to, I say gointer.

• Koozie – It’s a noun for a sleeve to keep drinks cold (or more likely “concealed”). Sounds to me like the name of a hit parade 80s rock band – Koozie and Krumb Topping.

• Stanky – a noun. It is the smell of a teenage boy’s locker room on a 90-degree day.

For me there are few things more entertaining than looking up the meaning of words I will never remember or be able to spell.

As I scanned the list it occurred to me there are a number of words I know that for some reason are not in the Oxford dictionary. (I checked.)

I have considered sending them a list of useful verbals and nounettes to add next time.

Here are a few.

• Whack-noodle – verb, adjective, noun, gerund, pronoun, interjection, conjunction. Often heard during off-the-record phone conversations during political season.

• Wieneeworst – adjective and intransitive verb. How my brain functions in the morning.

• Fricasseed barf – noun, adjective, gerund. A Christmas food and how the Democrats and Republicans in Olympia described each other after the 2015 operating budget vote.

I bet this is how Samuel Johnson got started writing his Dictionary of the English Language.

Maybe I have stumbled upon a new calling, like a loud moo from across the field, followed by a light from above, or below, then a voice whispers in my ear: Write it and they will think you’re nuts.

Dennis Box, Courier-Herald